It's a YOU problem.

It's December and we're starting to reflect on what we have achieved as individuals for 2019.

Some people are probably disappointed by the efforts they were able to make in 2019, while others will be entirely motivated to start planning their next steps on how to further their long-term goals into the year 2020.

No matter what it may be, December alongside January is always the month of reflection.

For me, December has been a month where I've been able to sit down and reflect on some of the amazing opportunities and experiences that have simultaneously shaped the type of person I want to be.

However, as I reflect on these opportunities and experiences, I also have been asking myself the question of whether I'm taking up space or elevating space.

When we've been in a space for too long, this sense of comfortability takes over us. We either start becoming too content for the kaupapa or we recognize that instead of sparking conversations in the hopes to instigate change, we're actually hindering progress.

Doesn't make sense?

Wait for it.

At the age of 15, I joined my first youth council. I stayed in that youth council until I was 21 years old and made the decision to leave - funnily enough during this exact same time.

At the time, I was thinking of the 15 years old girl who had been wanting a platform to share space with other young people. Little did I know that at the age of 21, I'd still be apart of that same youth council.

It's interesting, they teach you how to stay in this space but they don't teach you of when to leave.

I had to ask myself the tough question of whether I was taking up space because I had gotten too comfortable or whether I was actually helping the process and amplifying the voices of rangatahi in my community.

It's a tough question to ask yourself at any level, whether you've been apart of an organization for 10+ years or whether you were at the beginnings of the conversations of start-up groups that are now successful.

The more we attach ourselves to a space or role, the harder it may be to leave.

When you invest yourself into a space, you invest your mind, body, and soul [Well I did].

You invest your time, money and energy into a space because you believe in the people, the vision and the potential.

What we forget to understand is that our personal investment can and should only go so far.

The reason I say this is that there comes a time where you need to realize that there is only so much you can do for this space; whether it's a role, board, organization or a company. You need to realize that there comes a time where this space will need something that you can't offer and it's your time to minus yourself out of the equation. Look at it objectively and figure out what this space needs and whether you are taking up space for those needs to be achieved.

So, this time last year I realized that I was taking up space. I had done as much as I could and needed to step aside for this space to progress even further. I needed to understand that I was the boulder that needed to be removed off the footpath in order for people to access the multitude of opportunities that this footpath had to offer.

I realized that all that time I was criticizing the system and pointing out the flaws of everything. I had forgotten to point out the fact that I was stopping others from learning, growing and developing as young advocates. I was, in fact, the problem.

It wasn't a THEM problem, but rather a YOU problem.

Harsh but a reality I needed to come to terms with.

Until we recognize that we're not always needed in every conversation, every step and every decision; we'll be able to help support and work in collaboration to elevate spaces that reflect values that put people at the core of positive outcomes.

Because I hate to say this but it's not about you.

So, if you're at the end of the year reflecting like I am, know that time doesn't equal success.

Confronting?

I know.

But trust me, the moment you start to recognize that you have done enough for a particular space and you need to find other challenges to build different set of skills, is the moment you start to realise that your time in this space is coming to an end and it's time for you to leave.

The moment you start to realise that, is the moment you start to live a purposeful life, which consists of elevating space for others.